Ok, the child has been safely sent off to hospital. She's pale and ginger and probably suffering from heat exhaustion seeing as its nearing 50 degrees out here.

SO, what's new with me? Well, I am working in a beautiful 5* hotel in Turkey, my bosses care more about how much money I make and what colour hair bobble I have in than the fact that we manage to put on Mamma Mia and The Lion King every other week (they're amazing!) and I have a Turkish toyboy who's doing my head in! My mum visited the other week and that was a week of constant tears and tantrums and her being convinced that I was gonna marry a turk and start wearing a headscarf. I have a cat called Curdy (cos she's all black - Kurdish) who is little more than a kitten and is actually due to drop a few kittens of her own any day now. And two days ago I burned my ass cos I was sunbathing in a thong bikini.

There, I think thats all the important stuff out of the way!!

So - news???